The Picture Story of Wyricks Life (After the Zombie Gnome Attack)

I know that we have told you guys the story of how Wyrick can't find his wife and child since the Zombie Apocalypse and what not, but we we thought it would be fun if we told you through pictures. So this is Wyricks life since Zombie Gnomes first came to be.

Oh Legless Larry

I must admit that Legless Larry has to be one of the strangest Zombie Gnomes that Chris and I have ever encountered. This is why.

It might be a little hard to see but Legless Larry is up on a trashcan trying to catch some flies....Yeah....So I guess Gnome flesh is hard to come these days.....HAHAH SUCK ON THAT ZOMBIE GNOMES!

We're Back!

I know you're all probably wondering where we went. Well our home was invaded by Zombie Gnomes, so we fled to Sequoia National Park in Central CA. We also thought we could go hunting for Zombie Gnomes and see if there we any new species, but of course we didn't find any because we all know that Gnomes, and Zombie Gnomes for that matter, are born in gardens, anyways when we got home we found a bunch of surprises (which we will tell in later posts) Such as some new Zombie Gnomes that we found... but I'm giving away to much already. I probably shouldn't have said that....oh well here's an epic picture of Wyrick kicking some Zombie Gnome ass.

Halloween is Coming

So I just realized today that Halloween is in a few months and that means all the scary creepy things come out at night, and I really hope that doesn't mean new Zombie Gnomes will be coming....

Ghosts? Really?

So last night Chris and I were having a nice outside dinner with our friends, when we saw something stranger than usual. Which is saying something, right? We saw Legless Larry, Patient Zero, and Wyrick fighting (as usual) but they were all white. We tried calling out to Wyrick but he didn't answer. I went up to him and went to touch his shoulder but my hand went straight through and the strangest part was that they were renacting a battle that happened a few days ago on our neighbors yard! Honestly I thought Zombie Gnomes were strange, but the ghosts of Zombie Gnomes? That's just F'd up.

(Here's a picture we were able to take this morning. Its surprising we were able to capture their ghostly splendor)

If you would like more information click on this link: http://www.etsy.com/listing/75557823/zombie-gnomes-unpainted-collection

Helping out

Chris and I were able to talk to our neighbors and tell them about their Zombie infestation. At first they didn't believe it, but then we showed them their Pink Yard Flamingo being eaten and then they finally got it. Suprisingly they got really mad at us and said it was our fault! Our fault? For F#$& sake we have been the ones telling everyone about the danger of Zombie Gnomes and how they are a growing danger in people's gardens! Anyways Chris and I asked Wyrick if he would take care their problem and he gladly did. (It seems as though that's the only fun Wyrick every has anymore)

BTW- While Wyrick was taking care of those Pink Flamingo killers he weeded out (get it?... I know it's stupid...) some other Zombie Gnomes on their property.

More Info about..them...

It seems as though we have met this group before. They took one of my pink Flamingo about a month ago. It looks as thought these three Zombie Gnomes are the culprits: Nose-less Ned, Greedy Gary, and Bartolomeu.We don't know to much about this 3 little terrors, but I'm hoping that Wyrick will find some way to for us to defend against them.

Stay Safe, Stay Alive

Well, Wyrick came back yesterday. We had a long heart to heart about what happened. He said he was so sorry that he wasn't there to protect us. He thought he had found a lead on where is wife had gone. Instead he actually found something very disturbing. He told me to follow him to our neighbors yard and there I saw this...

It was such a disturbing sight that I was in a state of shock the whole day. I didn't know what I should write to you guys so I decided to take the day off and collect my thoughts. So here it goes. EVERYONE PROTECT YOUR OTHER LAWN DECORATIONS! It seems as though the Zombies Gnomes are starting to attack them as well as humans. Who knows what disastrous effects this will have on the delicate balanced lawn environment. Once I have more information on the poor pink yard flamingo and its attackers I will let you know.

Stay Safe Stay Alive

 Jane

ALIVE...well at least I am

Good morning everyone this is Jane. I know that all of you have been really worried about me, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm alright. I'm just a little scratched up. A Patent 0 attacked my leg while I was taking a picture, but it seems like I'm ok. I was able to get away before he bit me. Also I have NO SIGNS OF BEING A ZOMBIE. Thank God. I just need to rest up from my injuries. I'm hoping that Wyrick will come back soon. Who knows where he is but Chris and I miss him lots.

Come back to us soon Wyrick

WT H. E. double hockey sticks

Chris here, Jane was injured saving one of my little cousins from a surprise gnome attack,

 

she might not have been injured if she wasn't so photo happy,  but who's to say. You may be asking yourself where was chris through out this horrific attack? Well what does that matter there is no sense in playing the blame game, and what do I know about Gnomes, zombified or otherwise. The real issue here is the safety of Jane, and my cousin too I guess. Jane will recover, but where is that one non-zombie gnome we found that one time Whittier or Rick or Ricky-fly-by-five, it was something norse, or vaguely germanic. Either way, Where The H E Double Hockey Sticks is that guy?

Over Run

Today our lawn was overrun by Zombie Gnomes and Wyrick is no where to be found! What will we do!

A Thank You Note

Lately I have been feeling Chris and I haven't really been appreciating the hard work that Wyrick has been doing in our garden. So I just wanted to take the time to say, Thank you Wyrick. Thank you for being the protector of our Garden and shooting those stupid Zombie Gnomes in the face, and thank you for just being an awesome gnome. Also thank you for shooting me when I sometimes knock you over when I'm working in the garden. I really do appreciate that.

Jane

Oh Children. They are so innocent

Chris's little cousins live not to far away from us and they enjoy playing on our front yard. There are four of them between the ages of 7-11, so you can imagine how crazy it can get sometimes, but they are a lovable group and they are extremely fun to be around. Well a few days ago they were playing with their skateboards and bikes outside our lawn, when they saw the zombie gnomes going after a squirrel. They thought it was pretty funny so they "pretended" the Zombie Gnomes were attacking them. (we all know the Zombie Gnomes were)

 I looked outside and screamed at them to inside the house. I quickly summoned Wyrick to kill those nasty critters. The kids and I watched as there was an epic battle of Zombie parts flying across the garden. Finally Wyrick came out victorious (again I might add) and went back to his temporary home.

I turned to the kids and said, "And that's why you don't play with Zombie Gnomes". I am happy to say that we saved some lives that day. No one got hurt.

Wyrick Kicks Ass

So Chris and I were finally able to convince Wyrick to pose for us :). 

It seems this morning that Wyrick was having a really bad day (we think it's because he can't seem to find his wife and kid). As sad as that is though it worked out pretty well for us. Wyrick was just so grumpy and angry that he took on 3 Zombie Gnomes and killed them :)

Some New Pictures

We were able to take some new pictures of the Zombie Gnomes roaming our garden. So we thought we would post a few over the next couple of days.  Anyways here is Patient ZERO.5

We found him wandering the front lawn looking for something to eat one morning. We didn't want to get to close to him so we used a zoom lens to take this picture. Not long after we took the picture above Wyrick showed up (picture below) and shot his brains out. Yeah! Go WYRICK!

I Don't Know Why I'm Surprised.

I was making some breakfast this morning. You know just trying to relax before the day started, and I went to get some water to make some tea. As I was steeping my roobius tea, I looked out my window and saw this.

Poor Wyrick, but at least he is doing his job protecting our home. Wait a minute is that Legless Larry! I killed him! Twice! God damnit....stupid Zombie Gnomes.

The Zombie Gnome Sightings Board

As some of you might know Chris and I have been compiling a list for the past few months of all the people around the globe who have witnessed sightings of Zombie Gnomes. Sadly we got some news yesterday that there was a sighting in Australia. That makes 4 different countries (Canada, USA, UK, and (now) Australia) that have had sightings of these horrifying creatures. In the US there have been multiple sightings in 30 different states. This is terrible. My friends we must stand up against the Zombie Gnome horde or they will out run us! Spread the news and be vigilant friends!

Check the map and see if there has been a sighting in your city!

 http://thezombiegnomes.com/undead-news/the-virus-has-spread/

Well...It started out as a pleasant day

It's been really hot out here in California, So Chris and I wanted to get some gardening done before the blistering heat drove us away. We were having a wonderful time pulling weeds and watering our plants when we saw him...

I just killed you a few days ago! Damn little bastard. So I drove him to the sidewalk and did this again.

Good Morning...SURPRISE

So I woke up this morning to get some work done before Chris got up and I heard a strange racket outside. I looked outside my window and saw this...

Ug...they're back...those stupid Zombie Gnomes are back...I hope Wyrick kicks their ass.

Close Call

You know how I said the Zombie Gnomes haven't been around because they were probably planning something? Well I got attacked today. It was just a Legless Larry. So I wasn't really that scared but he is a creepy looking thing. Anyways I took care of him.