Here we are again

The nice thing about Christmas being over is that the Zombie Gnomes haven't been attacking as much. We had so many Zombie Gnome attacks it was almost impossible to handle! I guess Christmas just makes them really hungry...for whatever reason. But who knows what the next Year will bring. So this coming Feb. it will be 1 Year since Chris and I have been following the Zombie Gnomes! It seems so much longer since Chris and I have been spreading awareness of the those evil little guys. 

The Day After Christmas

Well it's been two days since Christmas and frankly Chris and I really needed the break from all of those crazy Zombie Gnomes. Wyrick, Mayfield, and Shemp came and opened presents with Chris and I. They didn't quiet understand why in the world we would cut down a tree and place it in our house, but they went along with it and even gave each other presents. Mayfield got nice new knife (which I suppose she could use for the kitchen but we all know its for killing those damn Zombie Gnomes) Wyrick got a brand new tobacco pipe. (His got broken when the Zombies attacked the house) and Shemp got his very first ax. It was very cute.

But now it's time to get back to work fighting those evil little Zombie Gnomes. Hopefully the new year will bring us a cure :)

Anyways Chris and I really hope that everyone else who reads our blog had a wonderful Christmas as well.

Crazy

I bet a lot of you have been wondering where the hell we've been. Here's a picture to explain...

Crazy right?

So we had an infestation of Zombie Gnomes. We literally stayed up for over 24 hours fighting them off. I guess the holiday season brings out the Zombie Gnomes...

An Early Christmas Present

We hope that everyone's Thanksgiving was wonderful. Chris and I had a lot of fun spending time with our families and even Wyrick and Mayfield showed up and said hi to everyone.

But anyways what we really want to share is that Wyrick gave us an early Christmas present....

Yeah....they are supposed to keep the Zombie Gnomes away... Anyways if you want to check out more pictures click here

PS $5 of every order of Zombie Gnome Ornament Heads will go to SEF (Small Enterprise Foundation) get more info here 

It's Time to Eat

Well Thanksgiving Day is here and Chris and I are just so thankful for Mayfield and Wyrick for coming into our lives and keeping those damn Zombie Gnomes away. And strangely enough we are sort of thankful for Zombie Gnomes because...well we wouldn't have anything to talk about if we didn't. 

Wyrick, Mayfield, and little Shemp are going to be joining us for thanksgiving. We are really excited and we will make sure to take some pictures to show to you guys.

PS Here is a great picture of Wyrick and Mayfield kicking some ass. :)

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Sneak Attack

We have had a lot of troubles with the Zombie Gnomes lately but thank God we now have Mayfield along with Wyrick to fight those annoying little Zombie Gnomes. Anyways a few days ago Chris and I were getting ready to go run some errands, when we saw Gertrude Guts eating a gnome. We were hoping we could save him but most of him was missing. Then suddenly out of no where Mayfield pops up behind her and shoots her in the back of the head.

Mayfield is so kick ass :)

They're Greedy Little Things

There seems to be some rivalry between the Zombie Gnomes. Gertrude loves to gobble pretty much anything and everything that she can find, and due to the fact that she still has her body parts and all, she can actually move pretty fast. Unlike poor Legless Larry who only has two arms to get him from place to place. Which of course makes it harder for him to actually eat anything. So lately he seems to be trying to get the left overs that Gertrude leaves behind, which isn't much. Anyways we thought you guys would enjoy this picture we took.

The Family is Back

Mayfield and the baby needed a break after the whole ordeal a month ago. So chris and I tried our best to keep the zombie gnomes away from them.They spent some good family time in the garden trying to relax, of a zombie gnome would slip by every once in a while but they didn't seem to mind. They we just so happy to be back together again that nothing would damper their spirits.

A few days ago we went to visit them and we asked them if they would be willing to go back on the job and fight the zombie gnomes. They took a minute to think it over and they said yes. They knew that it was their duty to destroy these abominations and also try to find any survivors who were out there. So here they are folks. The Family Pack. They are one mean fighting machine.

Check out some more pictures here

Zombie Gnomes Sighting Maps

As many of you know Chris and I have created a zombie gnome sighiting board where you can check out where's those cursed zombies have seen across the globe. We have just updated this map so go check it out and see if there have been any sightings in your area. Be strong friends. Fight the zombie gnomes!

Check out the map here

Happy Veterans Day (aka an update)

Hi all! It's been awhile. Things have been very very busy, but we got some new pictures to share with you guys over the next fews weeks. Here is a picture to describe what we have been up too.

Happy Veterans Day

Check out more pictures here

Gertrude Guts

I know that a lot of you have been probably wondering about who Gertrude Guts is. Well here you go :)

Gertrude had always been a big eater, but no one would have expected that her apatite would turn towards the flesh and guts of her other fellow gnomes. On the day she was turned she was visiting a gnome that she had liked for a really long time. Sadly he did not share the same feelings and told her so. She was so upset she ran home crying and ran into her newly turned Zombie mother who bit her face thus turning poor hurt Gertrude into a Zombie Gnome. Zombie Gertrude then went back to the gnome that rejected her and ate him and so was born Gertrude Guts

Check out some more pictures of Gertrude Guts here

Pinwheel Penny

I bet you guys are wondering who the new Zombie Gnomes are, so we introduce to you the unfortunate tale of Pinwheel Penny.

Her last day alive started out with laundry. Unlike most of the Gnome house, there was no natural spring welling up near the home, so she had to use a municipal drain that was a great distance away( about 12 yards away). When she finally returned home, she found her husband Larry lying the ground screaming in pain. He was missing his legs, and spraying blood everywhere, but somehow he was still alive. And as he died she kissed passionately, after a moment he pulled her in tighter, and ate her lips off of her face. She managed to escape his grasp only to turn into the living dead herself shortly after. So making the best of a bad situation she decided to get a snake from her old friend Mayfield. Instead she found herself face to face with her old friend, a pin wheel pinning her to the earth. 

Check out more pictures here

Here's what happened

So we image that some of you were able to read the update of Mayfield and Shemp. We thought we would give you a little more info on what happened to them.

We found Mayfield and Shemp lying in the garden barley alive a few weeks ago. A group of Zombie Gnomes were advancing forward when Wyrick jumped out and began firing. The distraction gave us time to save Mayfield and Shemp and take them back to the house. Wyrick came soon later and by then we were able to stabilize his wife and son. Not until the end of last we were we able to get some of their story and what a fun and adventurous story it was (we would tell it now, but our pictures haven't been developed yet)

We did figure out that the Mayfield was the one that left those Body Parts around the yard. (Damn she's kick ass)

The 2nd Wave Collection

So i know you guys want to know what the hell happened when we found Mayfield. So we thought we should first introduce some new characters into story. Here are the NEWEST Zombie Gnomes that we have found. Pinwheel Penny and Gertrude Guts.

Mayfield and her son Shemp, some of the last surviving garden gnomes, have just met up with the crazed flesh eater Gertrude Guts and her mother Pinwheel Penny. Mayfield and Shemp must fight off these horrifying Zombie Gnomes to get back to their husband and father Wyrick. This indeed with be an epic battle to the end of cunning, strength, and force of will. Hopefully they will survive and reunite with Wyrick.

If you would like to look at some more pictures come here :)

http://www.etsy.com/listing/83726023/zombie-gnomes-the-2nd-wave

Mayfield and Shemp

Here they are guys! Don't they look great! It took awhile but they finally got healed :)

This is Mayfield and her son Shemp. She and her son were separated from Wyrick at the beginning of the Zombie Gnomes Apocalypse when Wyrick went on a trip to visit a friend. Mayfield and Shemp fled the home when they were attacked by a hoard of Zombie Gnomes and have been on the run since. They have been desperately trying to find Wyrick, hoping and praying that he hadn't turned into one of the infected. Mayfield carries a blunderbuss while Shemp carries his trusty pop gun and just in case Mayfield also carries her rolling pin. Together they give 360 degrees of firepower.


check out some more pictures here!
http://www.etsy.com/listing/83639088/zombie-gnomes-mayfield

An Update

Yes, I know it's been awhile since we have last blogged. Things have been very crazy lately. Mayfield and the baby haven't been doing very well. We almost lost them a few days ago but they finally seem to be getting better. Hopefully we can send you guys so pictures in the next few days.

Also we have been getting a lot of messages from people about how their sightings so we have been trying to assist them in their Zombie Gnome problems...anyways it's been very busy.

We thought we would let you know that we have updated the Sightings Map so you can see if there have been any "findings" near your home.



http://thezombiegnomes.com/undead-news/the-virus-has-spread/

We hope you are all doing well, Stay Alive and Stay Alive Friends

Chris and Jane

Healing

Things have been very busy lately. We have been getting a lot of messages from people that they have had sightings of Zombie Gnomes and then there has been Mayfield. My guess is that most of you guys have figured out that we have finally found Mayfield. As of right now she's not doing very good. When we finally got to her she was pretty beat up (along with Shemp). They weren't infected they just needed to rest and so we are trying to nurse them back to health. Hopefully in the next week or so she and Shemp will be feeling a lot better. Once they are looking a little better we will post some pictures.

Stay strong friends! and let us know if you see any other Zombie Gnomes.

Chris and Jane

Zombie Gnome Body Parts

Well you know how we said we were going to show you pictures that we took on our adventure to find Mayfield? Well here they are....just to let you know thought they are graphic so you shouldn't let you children see them...

It's horrible isn't it! it looks like a few zombies attacked a Pink Yard Flamingo and then something came by and kicked their ass...hmm...I wonder what it could be...

If you would like to see more pictures check out our other link:
http://www.etsy.com/listing/82250533/zombie-gnomes-body-parts-expantion-pack

I know...I know

So we haven't made a new post in the last few days and I promise there is a really good reason for that! We had an amazing discovery and...well... we just aren't ready to spread the news...but we will this week!...we're so excited :) Well I guess we can give you a hint...it's about Wyrick's wife :)

Stay Safe

Chris and Jane

Well that's interesting...

Well we didn't find her, at least not yet. We did find something interesting though.... we found a trail of Zombie Gnome body parts in the backyard. It looks as thought something killed a few of them off. We don't have any pictures yet but once we do we'll post them....

The Beginning of Our Adventure

As you might know Chris and I have decided to go search for Wyrick's wife Mayfield. We think she might be lost somewhere in the Garden but to be honest we're not sure. If Wyrick couldn't find her then how can we? Well we're hoping that we'll have better luck. Anyways I just wanted to write this quick note before we left. Chris and I might be gone all day, so we will update you about what happens tomorrow.

 Wish us luck!
Chris and Jane

PS This is what I'm afraid we'll meet on our journey...

We're Doin It!

We talked to Wyrick yesterday (after he killed some more Zombie Gnomes) and asked him if it would be ok if we wrote a biography about his life... He said ok! We are so excited to start this new adventure. :)

Chris and I have noticed  though that there is something going on with Wyrick. Chris tried to talk to him but Wyrick just ran off and said that he had to kill some more Zombies. We are really worried about him and we think it has to do with his wife Mayfield. So Chris and I are going to go looking for her.  Maybe we can find her.

The Biography

So we are going to ask Wyrick if he would like us to write a biography about his life today.  We really hope he says yes.

and now they can climb trees?...great...

So something interesting happened a few days ago...we found Patient Zero up in a tree. How he got up there, we have no idea. To be honest, the thought that Zombie Gnomes can climb just scares me half to death.

As usual Wyrick came to save the day. (Thank God for him.) Chris and I are worried about him though. He is starting to act strangely again. I really hope he doesn't run off like he did a few weeks ago. We really need him here...

Zombies Like Jesus?

(More pictures of when they got in the house)

Not sure if they are praising Him or if they want to eat Him.... or maybe they just want Communion....

Well I guess we'll just see what happens.

House Invasion

After Legless Larry pestered my cat Treat, Patient Zero got in the house and the two of them began to explore / destroy their surrounds. For some reason they thought that turning on the water would be fun (thank God I was taking pictures of them and was able to stop them in time)

Then they moved over to the stove and started turning that on. By this time I got sick of them and summoned Wyrick to go kick their ass. (He distracted them while I turned off the burners)

and then Wyrick preceded to escort them out the door.

Well thankx again Wyrick. As I said before. You kick ass.

That Time They Attacked My Cat

I know we promised to show you some pictures of that time when the Zombie Gnomes got in the house so here are a few. Legless Larry, strangely enough, was the first Zombie Gnome to get in and the first thing he went after was our cat Treat. Treat didn't seems to get that Larry was a brain eating Zombie Gnome but he was cautious to make sure the nasty little thing wouldn't get him.

Treat finally got bored of Larry and walked away. Larry seemed kind of sad, (if Zombie Gnomes can be sad). I think he thought he made a new friend...

We will post more photos of the adventures the Zombie Gnomes had in our house in the next few days.

Stay Safe Friends,

Chris and Jane

The Zombie Gnome Sightings Board (Update)

Well August has just ended so that means it's time to update the Zombie Gnomes Sightings board. We are sad to say that we have added two more states to the list of Zombie Gnomes Sightings: Connecticut and Utah. This is indeed very sad news, but Chris and I just want to encourage you all that we can all defeat the Zombie Gnomes. Chris and I would hope you would join us to fight against these evil garden decorations and spread awareness to all your friends and family.

Here is the link (while you're there check out our Website)

http://thezombiegnomes.com/undead-news/the-virus-has-spread/

Ug...Zombie Gnomes...

Well it looks like Legless Larry and Patient Zero are trying to join in on the fun taking down Pink Yard Flamingos....

Great.....we really need to find some more Survivor Gnomes....

The Picture Story of Wyricks Life (After the Zombie Gnome Attack)

I know that we have told you guys the story of how Wyrick can't find his wife and child since the Zombie Apocalypse and what not, but we we thought it would be fun if we told you through pictures. So this is Wyricks life since Zombie Gnomes first came to be.

Oh Legless Larry

I must admit that Legless Larry has to be one of the strangest Zombie Gnomes that Chris and I have ever encountered. This is why.

It might be a little hard to see but Legless Larry is up on a trashcan trying to catch some flies....Yeah....So I guess Gnome flesh is hard to come these days.....HAHAH SUCK ON THAT ZOMBIE GNOMES!

We're Back!

I know you're all probably wondering where we went. Well our home was invaded by Zombie Gnomes, so we fled to Sequoia National Park in Central CA. We also thought we could go hunting for Zombie Gnomes and see if there we any new species, but of course we didn't find any because we all know that Gnomes, and Zombie Gnomes for that matter, are born in gardens, anyways when we got home we found a bunch of surprises (which we will tell in later posts) Such as some new Zombie Gnomes that we found... but I'm giving away to much already. I probably shouldn't have said that....oh well here's an epic picture of Wyrick kicking some Zombie Gnome ass.

Halloween is Coming

So I just realized today that Halloween is in a few months and that means all the scary creepy things come out at night, and I really hope that doesn't mean new Zombie Gnomes will be coming....

Ghosts? Really?

So last night Chris and I were having a nice outside dinner with our friends, when we saw something stranger than usual. Which is saying something, right? We saw Legless Larry, Patient Zero, and Wyrick fighting (as usual) but they were all white. We tried calling out to Wyrick but he didn't answer. I went up to him and went to touch his shoulder but my hand went straight through and the strangest part was that they were renacting a battle that happened a few days ago on our neighbors yard! Honestly I thought Zombie Gnomes were strange, but the ghosts of Zombie Gnomes? That's just F'd up.

(Here's a picture we were able to take this morning. Its surprising we were able to capture their ghostly splendor)

If you would like more information click on this link: http://www.etsy.com/listing/75557823/zombie-gnomes-unpainted-collection

Helping out

Chris and I were able to talk to our neighbors and tell them about their Zombie infestation. At first they didn't believe it, but then we showed them their Pink Yard Flamingo being eaten and then they finally got it. Suprisingly they got really mad at us and said it was our fault! Our fault? For F#$& sake we have been the ones telling everyone about the danger of Zombie Gnomes and how they are a growing danger in people's gardens! Anyways Chris and I asked Wyrick if he would take care their problem and he gladly did. (It seems as though that's the only fun Wyrick every has anymore)

BTW- While Wyrick was taking care of those Pink Flamingo killers he weeded out (get it?... I know it's stupid...) some other Zombie Gnomes on their property.

More Info about..them...

It seems as though we have met this group before. They took one of my pink Flamingo about a month ago. It looks as thought these three Zombie Gnomes are the culprits: Nose-less Ned, Greedy Gary, and Bartolomeu.We don't know to much about this 3 little terrors, but I'm hoping that Wyrick will find some way to for us to defend against them.

Stay Safe, Stay Alive

Well, Wyrick came back yesterday. We had a long heart to heart about what happened. He said he was so sorry that he wasn't there to protect us. He thought he had found a lead on where is wife had gone. Instead he actually found something very disturbing. He told me to follow him to our neighbors yard and there I saw this...

It was such a disturbing sight that I was in a state of shock the whole day. I didn't know what I should write to you guys so I decided to take the day off and collect my thoughts. So here it goes. EVERYONE PROTECT YOUR OTHER LAWN DECORATIONS! It seems as though the Zombies Gnomes are starting to attack them as well as humans. Who knows what disastrous effects this will have on the delicate balanced lawn environment. Once I have more information on the poor pink yard flamingo and its attackers I will let you know.

Stay Safe Stay Alive

 Jane

ALIVE...well at least I am

Good morning everyone this is Jane. I know that all of you have been really worried about me, but I just wanted to let you know that I'm alright. I'm just a little scratched up. A Patent 0 attacked my leg while I was taking a picture, but it seems like I'm ok. I was able to get away before he bit me. Also I have NO SIGNS OF BEING A ZOMBIE. Thank God. I just need to rest up from my injuries. I'm hoping that Wyrick will come back soon. Who knows where he is but Chris and I miss him lots.

Come back to us soon Wyrick

WT H. E. double hockey sticks

Chris here, Jane was injured saving one of my little cousins from a surprise gnome attack,

 

she might not have been injured if she wasn't so photo happy,  but who's to say. You may be asking yourself where was chris through out this horrific attack? Well what does that matter there is no sense in playing the blame game, and what do I know about Gnomes, zombified or otherwise. The real issue here is the safety of Jane, and my cousin too I guess. Jane will recover, but where is that one non-zombie gnome we found that one time Whittier or Rick or Ricky-fly-by-five, it was something norse, or vaguely germanic. Either way, Where The H E Double Hockey Sticks is that guy?

Over Run

Today our lawn was overrun by Zombie Gnomes and Wyrick is no where to be found! What will we do!

A Thank You Note

Lately I have been feeling Chris and I haven't really been appreciating the hard work that Wyrick has been doing in our garden. So I just wanted to take the time to say, Thank you Wyrick. Thank you for being the protector of our Garden and shooting those stupid Zombie Gnomes in the face, and thank you for just being an awesome gnome. Also thank you for shooting me when I sometimes knock you over when I'm working in the garden. I really do appreciate that.

Jane

Oh Children. They are so innocent

Chris's little cousins live not to far away from us and they enjoy playing on our front yard. There are four of them between the ages of 7-11, so you can imagine how crazy it can get sometimes, but they are a lovable group and they are extremely fun to be around. Well a few days ago they were playing with their skateboards and bikes outside our lawn, when they saw the zombie gnomes going after a squirrel. They thought it was pretty funny so they "pretended" the Zombie Gnomes were attacking them. (we all know the Zombie Gnomes were)

 I looked outside and screamed at them to inside the house. I quickly summoned Wyrick to kill those nasty critters. The kids and I watched as there was an epic battle of Zombie parts flying across the garden. Finally Wyrick came out victorious (again I might add) and went back to his temporary home.

I turned to the kids and said, "And that's why you don't play with Zombie Gnomes". I am happy to say that we saved some lives that day. No one got hurt.

Wyrick Kicks Ass

So Chris and I were finally able to convince Wyrick to pose for us :). 

It seems this morning that Wyrick was having a really bad day (we think it's because he can't seem to find his wife and kid). As sad as that is though it worked out pretty well for us. Wyrick was just so grumpy and angry that he took on 3 Zombie Gnomes and killed them :)

Some New Pictures

We were able to take some new pictures of the Zombie Gnomes roaming our garden. So we thought we would post a few over the next couple of days.  Anyways here is Patient ZERO.5

We found him wandering the front lawn looking for something to eat one morning. We didn't want to get to close to him so we used a zoom lens to take this picture. Not long after we took the picture above Wyrick showed up (picture below) and shot his brains out. Yeah! Go WYRICK!